Where is the "On" Switch (and what to do when you can't find it)

Yesterday, I stared at a blank wall for twenty minutes.

I wasn't meditating. I wasn't visualizing my five-year business plan. I was just profoundly, aggressively uninspired. To be fair, I wasn't the only one. My dog was sitting right next to me, intensely tracking the wall, waiting for a stray glimmer of light or a shadow to chase. At least she had a goal. I was just blank.

We live in a culture that treats ambition like a constant, roaring bonfire. We are told to grind, to manifest, to "hustle harder." But let’s be real: some days, the bonfire is a single, sad, smoking ember.

My 11-year-old daughter, Evie, walked into the studio during my staring contest with the drywall, took one look at my face, smirked, and just shook her head. It’s comforting to know that even when my inner light is dim, her ability to judge my vibe remains completely intact (she's a gem, and my #1 fan, for the record).

When the drive to create or build vanishes, our immediate reaction is usually panic. We think, “Well, this is it. The spark is gone forever.” In those moments, I have to channel my grandma. Whenever things went sideways or ground to a sudden halt, she would shrug and say, "It is what it is." It’s a beautifully unbothered phrase. It doesn't mean you give up; it just means you stop fighting reality. Right now, the tank is empty. It is what it is.

Yelling at an empty battery doesn't charge it. So, what do we actually do on the days when it's hard to keep things going? Here are a few entirely realistic, non-toxic-positivity strategies that help me through:

• Lower the bar to the floor. If you can't create a masterpiece today, just tidy one shelf. Clear one email. Make the hurdle so incredibly low that you can practically trip over it and still call it a win.
• Change your sensory input. If I’m stuck, no amount of staring will fix it (even if the dog disagrees). Walk outside without your phone. Drink freezing cold water. Shock your brain out of its rut.
• Borrow someone else’s spark. When my own inner light is dim, I look for external sources. Read a chapter of a book by someone you admire. Watch a documentary about a chef, an athlete, or a gardener. Seeing their love for their craft reminds you of yours.
• Give yourself permission to stall. If your body and mind are refusing to cooperate, they might just be desperately begging for a break. Rest is an active part of the creative process, not the enemy of it.

Ambition will come back. It always does. It’s just waiting for you to stop pushing so hard so it can sneak back in through the side door. Until then, channel my grandma, embrace the "it is what it is" energy, and give yourself a little grace.

Warmth & light,

Mel